Hot Chocolate & Revision Syndrome

The evening is drawing in, and tomorrow I start my first exam, of three this January series. As a MSc student, by now I should be well accustomed to the ways and means of which to survive the, what I can only articulate as, 'revision syndrome'. Those who know me well, or hang around in close proximity have probably already hear me talk about this idea. For those a little more unfamiliar with the idea I shall indulge, whilst I of course indulge in a beautiful hot chocolate, of which I will come back to, and explain further later on.

'Revision Syndrome' is a commonality amongst students, who take exams (sorry Bos, Simon, Scott and Matt to mention a few of whom this doesn't apply to, b******s) whereby your day consists of getting up, very slowly, normally around 9am-11am, grabbing your typical breakfast, if you can be bothered. For those closer to 11am, you decide that screw it you'll wait until lunchtime to justify breakfast, you perhaps stick on a little tv. If your feeling particularly intellectual you'll stick on a little BBC news, sky news if your a douche, if not, you scroll to see the other random crap that's on, typically Jeremy Kyle or repeats of something or rather, and somehow take some comfort in the fact that, yes someone else is more stupid, and less intellectual than you, and/or moreover someone has a more f***ed up family life, than the complex and crazy one you posses. Eventually you feel guilty at the amount of time you have wasted for the morning and consider revising. You force yourself to either go to the library (for those more 'social' revisers), or you stay at home. The home has an unwritten rule that most adhere to, some don't get it, and it pisses me off, that if a door is open, it means you want people to come distract you and be social. This is of mutual benefit as they also secretly desire and wish the same procrastination method. But if you actually wish to get some work done you close yourself in your room, with door firmly shut, forcing your housemates to feel that little bit more guilty, and question further whether the conversation merits any particular value of which to go through the process of knocking, and the formality of asking 'what you doing? etc etc.

You do an hour, maybe two depending on what time you started, by which point, the greatest procrastination hits home...lunchtime, you know that no revision, no matter how important can argue with the basic human right to food and proceed to spend as long as possible cooking lunch, during lunch, you can then watch more tv, either more of the same or something which justifies a small space in time, like a series or episode. I normally take HIMYM (a godly programme for those who haven't seen it, and for those who have...need I say more).

You then proceed to do more revision and the process repeats itself around dinner, by which after 5pm/6pm, you might do some revision, but if you don't its OK, because it does not consistute the 'typical working day' and thus is morally acceptable if you don't. Ironic considering that if you were truly honest you certainly didn't get up for a 'typical working day', but that was hours ago and hours revision have proceeded since then.

Ok, so this brings us to the ultimate symptom of revision syndrome, whereby, at any point throughout your day (namely the procrastination points), and through a variety of mediums (text, phone, skype, facebook message, facebook chat, email, or even a 'coffee catch-up', if your a bit of a girl like me) someone asks you the doomed question, that when asked, all your feelings and emotions just explode, and you cant help but let go of everything and burst out with pure, and utter brutal honesty, that when you look back at it post-exams, you think, 'god I was a douche back then', that question haunts you like a bad dream, day and day, it may even happen to you again, and again... and again. That question is....:


'What you been up to?'

You search your mind, hard and deep, you explore every possible answer, your try to articulate something that would inspire the weak, change the world. Yet all you can produce is... the truth... the truth about how you feel, you reply:

'To be honest.... nothing'

And you can't think of anything! Absolutely nothing! you did the same thing today, and you did yesterday, and the day before, and the day before that. The worst part about it, is that you know its also the same thing as you will do tomorrow. Revision to you seems just a endless loop, and bad version, of that REALLY bad movie 'groundhog' day, just around and around. You feel somehow that you are boring, and to be honest... you are. Temporarily of course (you hope).

So what about that hot chocolate you mentioned earlier mat? (rhetorical question), well. If it really is a syndrome, then my particular remedy to revision, and indeed similar syndromes (think about it...there are a few), I prescribe something within your daily routine that reminds you that life will always be sweeter (in my case...literally...sweeter). My cousin got me a tub of Whittards Hot Chocolate, it was the gold praline one, and its amazing! I know its only hot chocolate, and you would be justified at this point to think 'what the ****, this is mental. But actually there is a truth to having something, no matter how small that is in your life, that... that just makes you feel that little bit happier. It is not there because I need it, I don't need it to study, its not a cigarette, nor is it paper or pen. But, it makes me happy...so like any utility maximizer, I have 3 more, now with a collection of four tubs of hot chocolate sat with my Costa mug(yes I 'acquired' a mug, don't judge). One praline, one original luxury, one caramel and a white chocolate! Actually amazing. I find it a great antidote for revision syndrome, it makes me smile and happy, reminding me that life can be so sweet at times, it can give me toothache.

Ive just finished my mug, and the other side of the yard arm holds a 9am exam on economics, so I wish you good night

x9